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WHAT ABOUT THE CHILDREN
If children are sharing your grief, you should help them, even though it is hard to comfort others when you are in the midst of your own grieving. Many times children are ignored because adults want to protect them and shield them from death or adults are too upset themselves to consider what children are experiencing.
Adults may think children are too you to understand what is going on and are too young to remember the loss. Even under the ages of three, however, children feel loss. They sense that routines are disrupted, adults are sad, and someone they love is missing. Very young children may not comprehend death, but they understand sadness.
When a death occurs, children watch from the sidelines, not knowing how to participate and feeling abandoned.
Teens are often the most neglected when there is a loss because adults assume teens are old enough to handle grief themselves. This assumption often leaves teens without a source of comfort or an outlet for their feelings and fears. Even independent teenagers distancing themselves from adults need adult support in dealing with loss.
Teens may try to ignore their grief and act as if everything is normal. They may not want to upset parents, or seem childish and dependent. Regardless, teenagers need someone to talk to and also need reassurance that they are loved and cared for.